{ Andrew Mills }

3 (Marks): Journeying with Others: In the Beginning We all Need a “Helper”

On Sunday we looked journeying with others again. This is a key mark of a follower of Jesus, that they don’t follow him alone. Because we all need others, we need support, direction, and love. Life is meant to be lived together.

And this is actually what we discover way back in the very beginning. God shows up to Adam and says, “It’s not good for man to be alone”. And here I don’t think he is just talking about Adam specifically but humanity in general. That we were not created to live and journey in this world alone.

What is quite amazing is that pre-sin Adam still needed someone. That it’s not sin and challenges that causes us to need to journey together, but something in our very makeup. That it is simply put not good for humanity to journey alone. We all need others. We need a “helper” or “companion”.

Now this word in English gets read through patriarchal lens and it makes it seem like what Adam needs is a domestic wife to support him. That he needs a little helper at home. And this is not only demeaning to women but to God too, because that is not what God is saying.

God is actually saying it is not good for Adam to be alone, he needs a helper. He needs someone to save him, to protect him, to sustain him, to shield him, or to journey with him. The word “ezer” (helper) is most often used in the Psalms to refer to God’s activity of saving, sustaining, protecting, rescuing, or giving hope. So a “helper” is not a nice little addition to your life, but an active presence that guarantees your future through saving, sustaining, protecting and rescuing.

God is saying I believe that we all need those people in our lives. We all need companions who help us to journey into life, because life isn’t meant to be lived alone. This was the main point on Sunday, that life is meant to be shared with others. So I ended with a very specific challenge, to journey with two other people closely for the rest of this year. I truly believe that it isn’t good to live alone, so I challenged all of us to journey with others closely for this whole year. Two people at minimum (and your spouse doesn’t count) because we all need companions to rescue, protect, help, save, and give us hope.

For some of us we are doing this, and just need to keep doing this. For others we have friendships that can become deep and committed but we need to invest in them. And for others we don’t know where to start with relationships, but we are called to pray for them. Because God still wants to make sure all of us don’t live alone but with life-giving relationships.

So whether that means investing in your good relationships, investing in your potential relationship to become good ones, or investing in prayer for God to help you create some. We are all called to invest in relationships to live with and for one another. Because God is right, “It is not good to live alone”, we are called to live together.

Sermon Notes:

Big Idea: Life was meant to be shared with others, and we need to journey together

Teaching Points:

It is easier to be selfish and self-interested in our world, but it not better
That we need to be journeying with others, if we want to journey with Jesus
Life is not complete without someone to share it with
“To be rooted is perhaps the most important and least recognized need of the human soul”. Simone Weil
Commit to journeying closely with 2 other people this year

Adult Discussion Questions:

What stuck out to you from the sermon? What was challenging to you? What was new? What relationships have impacted you most? Which relationships do you have now that are closest? Who have been your “ezers” or helper and companions in life? Are there people in your life who are this to you now? Are there people in your life who you are like this for them? Can you commit to journeying with at least two people for this year?

Discussion Questions for Young Families

Journeying together isn’t just for adults but for kids and families as well. Studies show us that kids need 5 adults caring and pouring into their lives to truly thrive. So spend sometime thinking about the adults who can pour into your family, and what family you can pour into. Who are you journeying with as a family? And go spend time with them this week.

Challenge for the Week: Commit to journeying closely with 2 other people this year

September 21, 2015 by Andrew Mills

Who are Your Journeying With?

Who you journey with is often who you become like.

This is just true, and it’s so subtle that we don’t often see it. But we end up becoming like those who are around us.

So on Sunday we are going to be talking about journeying together and why it matters. Why we are made to be together. Why we each need a companion, a friend, and a community we are moving with.

So why not think about that right now? Who are you journeying with? What are they like? Because it’s probably what you are becoming like.

Do they invest in you? Do you invest in them?

Because the truth is relationships are sacred, and are meant to be shared. So who are you creating sacred friendships with, and how are you sharing them?

And come Sunday we’ll talk more about journeying with and deeper with those sacred relationships.

September 18, 2015 by Andrew Mills

The Problem of Evil, Theodicy, and the Power of Story

The problem of “theodicy” (evil, and cruelty in the world) is a problem that theologians have wrestled with for decades. I read this one line a little while ago and it really resonated with me.

What do you think of it?

We don’t have an argument that solves the problem of the cruel world, but we have a story – Francis Spufford

September 16, 2015 by Andrew Mills

3 (Marks): Journeying with Others: The Sacredness of Relationships

We began on Sunday by noticing something that is so obvious but that we forget: that our culture has a way of taking the depth out of our relationships.

What I mean by this is in our lives it seems like we have many more relationships at a loss of deep ones. We have lots of friends on Twitter, Facebook, or in our office but don’t have a lot of deep ones.

Jen Pollock Michel writes, “Our connections have grown broader, but shallower”. And I think that’s true. We know so many of the shallow details of one another’s lives, but don’t truly know one another.

But relationships are not just peripheral to our lives, they are absolutely central. They are where we experience not only life, but also God.

Andrew Root writes,

“Our relationships are the very field, the very place where God is encountered”

So relationships matter. That’s what we explored and we began with the only place I know to begin – the Incarnation of Jesus Christ.

God became human in the person of Jesus Christ. The implications of this are huge. But right off the bat we should notice one thing if God became a person – persons matter. If the person of Jesus Christ, God Incarnate, was shaped and formed by relationships, relationships matter deeply!

Our culture teaches us that relationships are to be used. To be used for our own needs, self-interest, entertainment or whatever. What the Bible teaches is that relationships are sacred and to be shared, and are places for us to give.

Pauls says in Philippians 2 that in our relationships we are to have the same attitude as Jesus, who emptied himself for others. This is to how we live as well. We are called to live with the same self-emptying, self-giving love in relationships.

Our world teaches us relationships are to be used; Jesus teaches us they are places of sacred connection meant to be invested in.

So on Sunday we ended with this main point: Relationships are sacred and meant to be shared. So often we use them, are entertained by them, or are forgetful of them. The Christian’s calling is to give, invest, and cultivate them.

So we gave the challenge to actually invest in relationships. To push past the shallow relationships of culture into real life-giving, God-finding, ones. The challenge for this week wasn’t for a week, or a day, or a month. But for a year. I challenged everyone to journey with at least two other people closely for a year. To choose to invest in relationships. To choose to find God in relationships. To choose to see the sacred and give like Jesus in relationships. Because what I know is this, that without relationships life dries up. But with deep relationships life bursts, spills over, and changes everything.

Sermon Notes:

Big Idea: Relationships are sacred and need to be shared

Teaching Points:

3 Marks of Christians: Love God, Love Others, Love the World
Our connections have grown broader, but shallower. Jen Pollock Michel
Our deep desire is to be known and to be loved.
Developing deep friendships isn’t helpful in following Jesus, it’s necessary if you want to follow Jesus.
“Our relationships are the very field, the very place where God is encountered” Andrew Root
Relationships aren’t a part of life, Relationships are life
Relationships aren’t tangential to our existence, we only exist because of relationships
Jesus is self-giving, self-emptying, self-sharing love and relationship
Many people now don’t have friends for decades, they have them while it,s convenient.
Relationships are places where lives are changed
Relationships are not shared interests, but shared connections.
“Everything changes because you share in her life and she shares in yours; you dwell with her and she with you. It is sheer grace” – Andrew Root

Adult Discussion Questions:

What stuck out to you from the sermon? What was challenging to you? What was new? What relationships have impacted you most? Which relationships do you have now that are closest? Which relationships do you need to invest in more? How have you seen God move in and through the relationships around you? Who can you journey with for the year?

Discussion Questions for Young Families

Today, rather than talking about relationships with your kids, invest in them. Ask them what they’d like to do, make it something special and build some experiences and memories. Focus on giving in the time, and be like Jesus emptying yourself for your kids.

Challenge for the Week: To pray about 2 people to journey with for the year.

September 14, 2015 by Andrew Mills

Relationships are a Gift

Sunday is a bit of a special day for me. We will be dedicating our beautiful little girl on her 1^st Birthday. And one of the great benefits of being a pastor is that when your child is dedicated you also get to preach.

So what I’ve done with our other kids, is to preach a sermon geared to them.

For my special little girl, I’m going to be talking about relationships.

Because here is the thing – relationships are sacred and special things. But they are also so prevalent and so infected by self-interest that we forget that. We so often use relationships for entertainment, our own needs, or self-interest that we forget the biggest thing about them.

Relationships are a gift – and that’s what I want to explore.

The truth is Eden doesn’t “do” a lot for me in any tangible sense of things. She can’t get me a drink, and I spend a lot of time caring for her needs. But because relationships aren’t about “meeting needs” but spaces where grace happen, she has changed me. Because she is a gift, and all good gifts are life-changing.

So that’s where we are going but before we get there take a moment to think through this important question:

Are there any relationships you’ve been neglecting?

It happens so easily, and so quickly. And if you’re tempted to skip past that question or are too busy then there are probably relationships that you might have skipped past in your busyness. So think it through and change it because relationships are gifts. Gifts of grace, God, and life.

September 11, 2015 by Andrew Mills

The Expectation Gap in Leadership

I want to talk about something in leadership I call the “expectation gap”.

The truth is that all leaders are always looking forward, and see “where we could be”. That’s inherent in being a leader, seeing the goal, the vision, and the hope.

But that creates an “expectation gap”. The “gap” between where we are at, and where we hope to be. And this gap exists for leaders in all sorts of areas in business, church, or even in relationships. We see where we hope to be, where we are working towards, but we aren’t there yet.

The trouble is that this “gap” can cause discouragement easily and quickly, because we have never “arrived”. We are never able to be content, and at ease because there is always more to do. This is inherent in any leader to drive for continual progress, growth, and excellence. But what do we do with the “gap”? How do we not let it discourage us, nor also create in us a sense of apathy?

Well to ensure that I don’t get discouraged, or apathetic I ask myself one question: is the gap shrinking or growing? Are we getting closer to the goal? Are we making progress? Because that’s what really matters to me – progress and movement. This helps me not to be discouraged that we’re not there yet, but also not apathetic that the journey is never completed. That question focuses me on the things that I think matters for leaders: movement, progress, and growth. Because the gap will always exist; so the point isn’t to get rid of the gap but continually shrink the gap.

September 9, 2015 by Andrew Mills

3 (Marks): Three Circles

On Sunday we kicked off a brand new series looking at the three marks of a Christian. We began by discussing what the “marks” of a follower of Jesus are. And we began with a really simple, but difficult question: what is a disciple of Jesus?

At first glance that question seems simple doesn’t it? A disciple of Jesus is someone who follows Jesus. But what does that mean? What does that look like?

I think these questions really matter because if you only have a vague idea of what God is asking of you, chances are you won’t be getting where God wants you to be.

So we began to define what a disciple and the three marks of a Christ-follower by looking at two passages: Matthew 22:36-40 and Matthew 28:18-19.

And in the first passage we got the first clear glimpse into what a follower of Jesus looks like. It looks like someone who loves God. But loving God isn’t enough, because you can love God and still miss out on living like God. People who loved God caused the crusades, inquisitions, and still today spew hate. The idea of “loving God” needs definition or all sorts and manners of hate can be spewed in defense of God.

This is why Jesus then utters a second command he says is just as important as the first. We need to love others. Loving God, necessitates loving our neighbors. Jesus gives definition for what loving God looks like, and it looks like someone who loves their neighbour.

So the first two marks of a follower of Jesus are loving God, and loving their neighbour. But those two aren’t enough, there is a third mark. Because you can end up loving God and loving others but not having a forward momentum, you can end up isolated, rather than transforming the world. We need to also hear not only the great commandment but also the great commission.

Jesus says in Matthew 28:18-19 that we need to go out and make disciples. We need to spread his love and light among the world. We need to go out and bless the nations and bless our neighbours. Part of the Christian calling isn’t just to love God, and love our neighbours, but to also actively love the world around us.

And we need to do all three: loving God, loving others, and loving the world. Because if we aren’t doing any of the these three marks of a Jesus-follower our lives will not be fully formed.

So that’s where we went on Sunday explaining the three circles of love and how every Christian needs to do all three. Now as we move forward we’ll unpack each of those circles and for how, if you focus on journeying, connecting, and serving, you’re life with Jesus and those around you can be changed. Which is what following Jesus is all about – being changed by him, and changing lives with him.

Sermon Notes:

Big Idea: Jesus followers should love God, love others, and love the world.

Teaching Points:

A mark is:
- 1) An obvious object or article that serves as a guide to travellers
- 2) An impression or a distinguishing trait or characteristic
Vague impressions of direction get you no where.
What is a disciple?
Loving God needs definition.
Loving God and Loving others are part of what following Jesus means.
Loving the world propels us out into the world.

Adult Discussion Questions:

What stuck out to you from the sermon? What was challenging to you? How did God speak to you through it? What was new? What circle do you most resonate with (Loving God, Others, or the World)? Which circle do you most struggle with? How do you think you might grow deeper with your struggling circle?

Discussion Questions for Young Families

Take a look at your family and think through which circles you are good at, and which ones you need to grow in. Ask your kids then for ideas for how to grow in the difficult circles and put them into practice.

Challenge for the Week: Make a decision to grow in all three circles

September 7, 2015 by Andrew Mills

3(Marks) of a Christian

On Sunday we are starting a brand new series. We are looking at what the three marks of a Christ-follower are. For sure we should look like Jesus if we are followers of Jesus. But what does this practically mean? If we could distill it down and make it concrete, practical, and real life – what would a Christ-follower look like?

That’s what we want to explore for the next few weeks. We want to take all the “vagueness” out of following Jesus and make it concerte and real. We want to give each person three goals, or three marks to pursue in their life that will draw them deeper into life and into Jesus’ life.

So join with us as we discover what the three marks of a Christian are.

September 4, 2015 by Andrew Mills

Abusive Authority, Good Leadership, and The Inner Life of Leaders

This quote by Derek Flood really speaks to me, and also challenges me.

Of all sins, the sin of abusive authority is particularly dangerous because it masquerades as righteousness, claiming to speak for God.

It challenges me because I am a leader, and because I lead I have a certain “authority”. Which means I can fall prey to a specific sin of leaders: abusing authority. And nothing will wreck a community faster or deeper than abusive authority.

We’ve all seen some leadership and authority go sideways. Where it goes bad, where they hurt someone (maybe you), where unquestioned obedience is the rule, where it’s just plain unhealthy.

But the answer to bad leadership, isn’t no leadership, but good leadership.

And to have that we have to recognize the fact that if we are a leader our inner life is crucial. If we want to ensure that we never abuse our authority our inner journey must be a priority.

What I mean by this statement is this: that if as a leader your inner life is in turmoil, unclear, or unknown you cannot lead well. Those who end up abusing authority, who try to “speak for God”, who masquerade as righteous have an inner life that is a mess, unknown, or hidden.

The truth is that if you want to lead well it isn’t about knowing how to inspire people, move people, or set goals. If you want to lead well you need to know yourself and God well. That’s the central starting point of leadership. If you don’t know who you are, you will be tempted to find yourself in power, accolades, or success and fall to the sin of abusive authority. Abusive authority can be prevented, but not without deep inner work of prayer, identity formation, and understanding of who you are wired to be.

I write all of this for two reasons. First, if you are a leader, and want to avoid the sin of abusive authority spend time to know yourself and know God. The inner journey is more difficult than the outward journey of leading. And let me say this, it’s also less cool. It’s way “cooler” to be leading a massive group of people. It’s less glamorous to be sitting in prayer processing why that little comment someone said really cut you deeply. But the process and inner work is true leadership.

And secondly, I write this as a caution for everyone of us. All of us are following someone, all of us (even if we are leaders) are influenced by others and their leadership. But we should be cautious of whom we let influence us. If who we are following who doesn’t’ seem to know themselves or God, simply be cautious, be wise, and be prudent. Because if someone doesn’t know who they are called to be, they cannot help you become who you are called to be.

So my main point from all of this – is this: leaders know yourself well so you can lead well. Take time to do the hard inner work. Because good leaders move to being great leaders not by bigger crowds, but by deeper inner work.

September 2, 2015 by Andrew Mills

Finding God on Your iPod: U2 and a Girl Called Grace

On Sunday my wife protested my song choice for this series. It had something to do with picking “songs so obscure only I could love them.” So I promised her one Sunday of a song by a band most of us would know. And that Sunday, was last Sunday. And that band was U2. We listened to and jumped, taught through the song “Grace”.

The song “Grace” has some beautiful lyrics. And what is wonderful is they give a starting point to hear some familiar words with fresh ears. 1 Corinthians 13 is commonly known as the love chapter. It is read at weddings, and is now so overly familiar that it’s lost some of its “oompf”. So to regain some of that we read 1 Corinthians 13, along with Bono’s lyrics to make some new connections.

Bono sings that “Grace has the time to talk”. And I love that line because not only is it true, it’s also incredibly pertinent and practical. Paul says that love is patient, but for many of us we are so busy we don’t even have time to talk. Time to listen. Time to show love through our giving of ourselves.

Paul continues saying that love is anything but rude, proud, or self-centered. Love, in essence, isn’t aggressive, showy, and loud. Or as Bono talks about love and grace “when she goes to work / you can hear her strings”. Love sounds like strings of invitation, movement, and gentle melody. Pride though as Paul says, sounds like a clanging cymbal.

Paul writes that love doesn’t keep records of wrongs. This is something I wish we would not only know, but practice. But sometimes we’ve heard it so often we forget it too quickly. Bono gets at the same things singing, “Grace moves outside of karma”. Grace and love aren’t record keepers, but forgiveness givers. And lastly, we looked at how love lasts and never gives up. Or as Bono puts it, “it’s a thought that changed the world.”

We tried to use the song to get a fresh glimpse into Paul and our main point: grace and love change the world and change lives. They have changed lives and will keep changing lives if we put it into practice.

So to discern how to put love into practice we ended by reading 1 Corinthians 13 with our name in place of the word love. Because Paul is really giving us a challenge for how to live, not just teaching on the abstracts of love. Paul is teaching us how we are to live. So as we read the passage we asked God to make it true in our lives, and direct us in anywhere we need to start acting differently.

[ ] is patient and kind. [ ]is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. [ ]does not demand its own way. [ ] is not irritable, and keeps no record of being wronged. [ ] does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. [ ] never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

(Read the passage slowly multiple times, and put your name in the blank, and let God speak to you through it)

Sermon Notes:

Big Idea: Grace and love change the world and change lives

Teaching Points:

All truth is God’s truth.
Grace has the time to talk – Bono
When she goes to work / You can hear her strings – Bono
Love is the opposite of self-centeredness
She travels outside of karma – Bono
Grace and love change the world and change lives
Scripture interprets Scripture

Adult Discussion Questions:

What stuck out to you from the sermon? What was challenging to you? How did God speak to you through it? What was new? What is your favorite U2 song? When you read the passage from God’s perspective what jumped out? When you read it with your name in blanks, how did God speak to you? What jumped out?

Discussion Questions for Young Families

Today talk to your kids about their favorite song. Ask them why they love it, and what they learn from it.

Challenge for the Week: To put love into practice

August 24, 2015 by Andrew Mills