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Getting Out of Your Seat

1380002_96509223At this year’s Regional Gathering (our denomination’s annual conference) the speaker Caesar Kalinowski made an interesting and very true comment. He said this:

“Very little discipleship happens sitting in seats”

He was referring to Sunday morning primarily. And while as a pastor, clearly Sunday mornings are a large part of my job, I wholeheartedly agree with him. Because here is his point: following Jesus requires movement, practice, and action.

Often on Sunday mornings we learn about Jesus, but discipleship happens when we follow Jesus. Discipleship happens when we get out of our seats and let Jesus start to transform the totality of our lives. And yes, to follow Jesus means you need to learn about Jesus, but it is possible to learn lots about Jesus and not follow him. Caesar’s point is that discipleship breaks down when the learning gets separated from the following.

This doesn’t mean that Sunday morning services don’t matter. They do, and I put a lot of prayer and effort into mine. But what I know is that Sunday mornings aren’t the endpoint of discipleship, but the starting point – the sending point. We gather together to get reminded of what following Jesus looks like, and get sent out to live that in a new way that week.

So Caesar is right, discipleship doesn’t just happen in seats, which is why each week we gather as the church, to be sent out as the church into our communities.

And this is just a reminder that discipleship is a process, a journey, a sending, but most of all a following. So as you live, work, and play this week – remember who you are following and how you are learning to live like him.

Learning to Eat Frogs

1059950_13941892I don’t know where I heard this analogy but I often think of it. And by often I mean all the time. I actually have a list called “Frogs to Eat” on the top of my monthly goals. And that heading will make sense in a moment.

But here is the idea. Leadership is like eating frogs.

There are things each of us has to do to be an effective leader that we might not want to do. And this changes for each person in each role. The point is that leadership entails doing things that we might rather not do. For example we might need to make a tough phone call, to do that admin we’ve been procrastinating on, to take that leap whatever. We all have things we need to do that we don’t want to do, that’s eating frogs.

Frogs are the weekly tasks that for whatever reason seem annoying, distasteful, or unwanted – but are needed to be done. And that’s key.

So here is how it works: Each week you have a certain number of frogs you need to eat to move forward. If you don’t the next week, the number of frogs you have to eat just multiply, and the frogs grow bigger as well. Time never makes a hard decision easier. Each time you delay doing that thing you need to do, the number and size of the frogs grow.

So leadership is learning to eat the frogs before they grow and multiply too much. That’s the idea.

Each month then I line up and think through what are the frogs I need to eat. Things I’d rather not do, but that are crucial to do; things I’d rather delay than decide on. Then I try to eat those frogs. It’s not the fun part of leadership, but it a crucial part of it.

So here is my question for you today: what frog do you need to eat?

We Keep Forgetting Who We Are…

Nouwen

Henri Nouwen, who is generally brilliant in all he writes, once wrote this:

One of the tragedies of our life is that we keep forgetting who we are.

And this true.

One of the great tragedies of our lives is that we forget who we are. We forget that we are loved. Because who we all are, according to the Bible, are people who are deeply loved, cherished, and valued by God. We have value, worth and intrinsic significance, not just because of what we do or believe, but because the Creator loves his creation; because the Father loves his children; because the King loves his people; because the Spirit loves his family.

The point is that it is a tragedy whenever we forget who we are, when we forget we are loved. Because when we forget this central truth, our lives can spiral and spin through difficulty, and insecurity. But when we are centred on this truth, that we are loved, our lives can burst forth meaning, courage, and significance.

So I just think that’s something worth reflecting on today. That you are loved. Don’t forget it.

How Hudson Reminded me of What Resurrection Means and Why It Matters

30026_10150185277700328_2981872_nYesterday was the anniversary of my dad’s death. I say death, and not passing, because death sounds like a harsher word. And it is a harsher word; it speaks the hurt that happens because of it.

Since I was feeling quite down, I thought the best thing would be to talk to my sons about why I was feeling sad. I didn’t want them to think it was about them, and thought I could share a bit about their grandfather with them.

So Hudson sat with me and I told him that I was feeling sad because my dad, his grandpa, died on this day a few years ago.

Hudson didn’t know quite what to make of that. So he tentatively asked, “He…died.” I said yes he did. He said, “Like this”, and proceeded to make a face with eyes closed and tongue stuck out. I said yes like that, and thought maybe having this conversation was a bad idea.

The next 10 sentences we shared together I doubt I’ll ever forget. They sound made up, but they were true and unforced and untouched. I believe God can speak to us through anyone, and I think he chose to speak to me through my son. And this is what he told me, and why I think sometimes 4 year old are closer to God than anyone.

He said, “It’s okay dad to be sad, but just for a little while. I miss grandpa too. He loved me, and loved to scoot me around and he loved you. Grandpa told me I was special. I miss him too. So you can be sad because he died but just for a little while.”

I asked him why just for a little while. And this is what he said, “Because daddy, Jesus died too right? (I said yes he did). But Jesus is here now. He’s alive. He told me so, and so did you. So grandpa is with Jesus now. He died and is living just like him. He’s here too, and he loves us daddy. So its okay to miss him, but it just for a little while because he’ll be back again right…just like Jesus”

And I said the only thing I could think of, “Of course you’re right Hudson”

Hudson then gave me a big hug, and said “I love you daddy, and I love grandpa too” And then because he is also a four-year old he asked if we could play trucks tomorrow, and if Jesus had wings, which we then talked about.

I write all this because sometimes in the hard times, you just need to be reminded of what is true. And sometimes that takes a 4-year old who remembers what you teach him, so he can remind you of what matters.

A Reminder I’d Rather Not Have…The Anniversary of My Dad’s Death

My dad died 4 years ago today. This is a day that I mark in my life but I wish this is a day that would never have happened. It reminds me and brings me back to a very difficult time in my life.

This is a day that comes around once a year that reminds me of something I know each and everyday – that someone is missing.

Someone is missing at my son’s soccer games. Someone is missing after I preach a good sermon to talk it through with. Someone is missing to give me advice and counsel when I desperately need it. Someone is missing in my life.

Some days its felt more than others, but its always felt. And today is one of those days.

So what do you do on days like today? Where things are hard, loss seems so present, and hurt so close by?

Well here is my answer – but I promise you it’s not a good one, or really one you’d expect a pastor to say. But it is an honest answer. You give in for a day. You give in for a day.

I know people say be strong, say get through it, say don’t ever give up. I know people say that, but sometimes I just think people are wrong or maybe others are just stronger than me. But I know when days like today come around once a year, the answer isn’t to try to tough it out, the answer isn’t to try to forget the hurt, the answer isn’t to busy yourself past it, but to enter into it.

So that’s what I’m doing today. I’m giving in for a day.

There is a line in a song I love by Florence and the Machine that says this, “I’m not giving up, I’m just giving in” And that’s how I feel today. I’m not giving up. Tomorrow I will get up and go to work. Tomorrow I will wake up and cook breakfast for my boys like I do every day. Tomorrow I will check emails, read Facebook, and check soccer scores. Tomorrow I will get back to my regular rhythm of life. But that’s tomorrow, today I won’t. Today I’ll give in, and remember that the rhythm of my life has forever been changed because someone is missing. So I will give in, I will be sad, I will sit, I will think, I will pray, and then decide I don’t want to pray, and I’ll talk about my dad. And I’ll repeat those actions a hundred times today.

You might disagree that this is healthy. That’s fine, do whatever is healthy for you. Tough it out if you can. But I know I’ve just never been that tough. So today “I’m not giving up. I’m just giving in.” And if you’ve ever been through loss, difficulty, or death it’s okay to give in for a day.

What is the Wise Thing To Do?

So on Sunday we pursued one question that I think will change your life. It will lead you into becoming a wise person. The question is this: what is the wise thing to do?

And at first glance it’s such a simple question that it doesn’t even seem that helpful. But if you think back to your greatest regret, failure, or mess up – I bet if you had asked that question, and followed through with it – things would be different.

So that’s what we looked at on Sunday; one simple question and 4 different responses to it. In Proverbs there are 4 types of people mentioned and each type of person has a different response to this question.

The first type of person Proverbs says are “simple”. These are people who do not know enough yet to ask this question. They are the young, naïve, and innocent people. These are our kids, and others who don’t have enough maturity or experience yet to ask this question – what is the wise thing to do.

The next type of person is a foolish person. This is someone who knows enough to ask the question, and knows the answer but doesn’t care enough to follow it. If you ask a fool what the wise thing to do is, they can often tell you. But they don’t care to follow it. This is because as Proverbs says Doing wrong is fun for a fool. Proverbs 10:23. So they know that dropping out of school, going to that party, not showing up for work isn’t wise. They just don’t care enough to change. That’s what Proverbs calls the foolish person.

The next person is the mocker. Proverbs descirbes them as someone who has given up on the question. They don’t care about being wise, they care about being in control and cutting people down. They want to be the best in the room, but rather than focusing on being wise to gain respect, they focus on being critical to lower others around. They know what is wise, they just don’t care about the question, or those who follow it.

And then the last type of person is a wise person. This is someone who knows the question, what is the wise thing to do, unlike the simple person. This is someone who cares about the question, unlike the foolish person. This is someone who hasn’t given up on the question, unlike the mocking person. The wise person is someone who asks the question, and follows through on it.

They ask, “What is the wise thing to do?” And then they do it.

That was our challenge this week. To ask that question each and everyday, and also to make it personal. To say in light of my stage in life, my finances, my future, my past, who I am etc. What is the wise thing to do? Because what is wise for you and for me might be different because we are different. So we challenged everyone to ask that question and to make it personal.

Here is the beauty of the question, what is the wise thing to do. Even if you come to a situation where it is so complex and difficulty you are unsure what is  the wise thing to do – the question still works. Just ask, “What is the wise thing to do, when you don’t know the wise thing to do”.  The answer is pretty simple – go to God, go to others that are wiser, and move slowly.

So this one question I believe can prevent so much regret, start to heal relationships, and set our lives in the right direction. And all we need to do is ask it, and follow it.

 

Sermon Notes

Big Idea What is the wise thing to do?
Take Aways…
  • Being wise is about knowing how to apply knowledge
  • Being smart does not equate to being wise
  • What is the wise thing to do?
  • Four types of people: Simple, Fool, Mocker, and Wise
  • Simple people don’t know enough to ask the question
  • Fools know enough to ask the question, but don’t care enough to follow it.
  • The words of the godly encourage many, but fools are destroyed by their lack of common sense. Proverbs 10:21
  • A foolish person didn’t care enough to think.
  • Eventually being foolish isn’t fun
  • The mocker has given up on the question.
  • Ask this question, “What is the wise thing to do”, and follow it through
  • Is it wise for me to do?
Adult / Group Discussion Questions What stuck out to you from the sermon? What was challenging to you? How did God speak to you through it? What was new?

Have you ever in life been, the “simple person”, “foolish person”, or “mocking person”? How do you think asking the question, might help? What major decisions are before you right now, or major issues or situations? What would be the wise thing to do? Who can help you to do the wise thing?

Discussion Questions / Actions for Young Families Talk to your kids about today’s topic. Teach them the question – “What is the wise thing to do” and explain it to them using some examples. Maybe as an example, eating a few treats is great, eating all of them isn’t wise as you’ll get sick. Get into the habit too of asking them the question when they come to you for advice.
Challenge for this Week Ask the question: what is the wise thing to do, and follow through.

One Question to Change Your Life

 

1419184_44660695On Sunday we are jumping into the book of Proverbs and we are going to discover one question that will change your life

 

I know we say that a lot – that something will change your life. Everything from an new exercise machine, to a new type of taco. But I truly believe this one question will change your life. It will prevent heartache, it will lessen regret, it will change the direction of your life and move you closer towards God.

 

So obviously I didn’t come up with the question, Solomon did. As the wisest man, we are going to learn from him how to be wise.

But before we get there why not spend sometime today reading Proverbs. The very fact that we are still reading something written 3000 years ago – means that it must be good to have lasted. I doubt anyone will read anything I write in 3000 years, but Solomon’s wisdom was so deep it is still shaping people today.

 

So before Sunday why not read through some of Proverbs. They are short, easy, and some will strike you as dead on true. So here is one of my favorites that we’ll talk about on Sunday.

 

As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his foolishness. Proverbs 26:11

 

What’s your favourite verse?

 

Daddy You’re My Son

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Earlier this week Hudson woke me up from bed because we all slept in (Praise God!). And he said something a bit strange…”Wake up daddy, you’re my son. I love you. Wake up daddy”. And I said to him, “Hey buddy I’m your daddy, you’re my son. I’m not your son.”

And then he explained what he meant to me. Hudson went on to explain how I am his son, because he loves me. Hudson has somehow so associated the word love, and son – that they have become almost interchangeable for him.

And for me this is an amazing thing!

What it means is that I must use the words love and son in such close connection so often that Hudson hasn’t separated them. That for him they are almost synonyms. He believes that to be a son is to be loved, and that when you love someone they are your son.

And it just made me think – what if all our kids new this? I mean, what if they all knew deep down that to be a son or a daughter is to be loved? That being loved is foundational to their identity as a son or daughter? That because they are a son or a daughter they are loved beyond anything else and that – that love is certain and forever? What if the words and actions of our lives so tie together the words sons, daughters, and love that they can’t be separated? I think this is a beautiful goal and it is also a godly goal.

Because if we learn anything from the Gospels we should learn that in God’s Kingdom to be a child of God and to be loved unconditionally are intimately tied together. That being a son or daughter of God is so foundationally tied to being loved completely that they can’t be separated. 1st John 3:1 says this, “See how very much our Father loves us, for he calls us his children, and that is what we are!” Being a child of God is to be loved by God, and being loved by God is to be included and welcomed into his family. I just think that’s beautiful. And I think anytime we can model that love and inclusion in our own families is important too.

So obviously all of that is to say that I didn’t correct Hudson. So if he runs up to you and says you are his son, it just means he loves you deeply like a dad does a son. And that’s not a bad thing.

The Women in Jesus’ Life and In Ours

1422766_42566222On Sunday we looked at the story of Jesus and the influence of women on the story of Jesus. And this matters because today in our world we still seem to set the bar lower for women. But the point is that Jesus didn’t – so Christians shouldn’t either. The first person to meet the divine in flesh was a woman – Mary.

The first person to discover that Jesus was the Messiah was a woman – the woman at the well.

The first person to discover the resurrected Jesus and be the first witness to the miracle that changed the world – Mary in the Garden.

The point is that women are central to the story of Jesus. And not just central because Mary, Jesus’ mother, gave birth to Jesus.

Mary did not change the world because she was a mother. I know that sounds controversial but it really isn’t. Mary changed the world because she was obedient and said yes to God. Before Mary was a mother, she said yes to God. That yes changed the world, through her giving birth to Jesus, but birthing Jesus didn’t happen before she said yes.

The point is that Mary matters not firstly because she birthed Jesus, but because she first said yes to God. Motherhood is not the highest calling of a woman in the Jesus story; obedience, faithfulness, and saying yes to God in his various callings is the most important thing.

So that’s what we looked at on Sunday; how important woman were to Jesus’ story. How in Luke 8 we read that women financed Jesus ministry. How Jesus radically included and welcomed women into his ministry. How Jesus bypasses social barrier to remind us that God welcomes each person.

And as we reflected on this reality we shifted to think about ourselves. If women were this central in shaping the Jesus story, who has been central in shaping our personal stories? What woman has supported us, said yes to us, and been faithful to us that made us who we are? Whose investment shaped the direction of our lives?

And after thinking of that we left with one challenge: to go and thank them. To thank them for their prayers, their support, their investment. Whether they  happened to be our mothers, grandmothers, aunt, friend, community friend – whatever – to thank those women who made our stories better. Because that’s what the gospels insightfully reveal about Jesus. That women made his story fuller and better, and I can say it’s the same in my life. So why not thank them for that.

Sermon Notes:

Big Idea: Without women there would be no story of Jesus

Take Aways…

  • Women are central to the story of Jesus.
  • Not only are women central to Jesus story, but our stories as well.
  • Jesus interaction with women was revolutionary at the time
  • “Jesus actions towards women were controversial, provocative, and even revolutionary” Joel Hamilton
  • But what we see in Jesus is God available to everyone
  • Mary didn’t change the world because she was a mother, but because she was obedient.
  • Changing lives begins by saying yes to God.
  • God bypasses barriers to communicate directly
  • Women matter in this story of God.

Adult / Group Discussion Questions: What stuck out to you from the sermon? What was challenging to you? How did God speak to you through it? What was new? Had you realized the important role women played in Jesus life before? What women have played an important role in your life? How did they impact and influence you? How can you show them your thanks today?

Discussion Questions / Actions for Young Families: Today talk to your kids about the importance of valuing the women in our lives. Have them share who some of the important women are in their lives. Decide on a way to show them that you are grateful for them today – and then do it.

Challenge for this Week: Thank those women who have changed us today

Mothers Day and The Women in Our Lives

931217_47664381On Sunday we are looking at how women shaped the story of Jesus. Because even though we might be familiar with it the fact is this: without women there would be no story of Jesus.

And I just don’t mean that without Mary giving birth to Jesus, there wouldn’t be a story of Jesus. I mean without the support, financing, investment, and connection that Jesus has with women there would be no story of Jesus. 

So that’s what I want to look at how women shape and influence Jesus’ story, and also ours as well.

But before we get there why not think about that a little bit this weekend. What women have influenced and shaped your life? Not only maybe your mom, but grandmothers, aunts, nieces, school teachers, friends, adopted mothers, co-workers, bosses, or neighbours.

What women have shaped your story and have you said thank you?

That’s a good place to begin before we get to Sunday.