Daddy, Does Jesus Drive a Car?

10155716_10154023179635643_2268177282718299247_nThe other day Hudson and I were playing race cars. It was going great, and then he stopped and looked at me and asked: “I want Jesus to come over and play”. Because Hudson has a relationship with Jesus, he wants to play and connect with Jesus. This is a good thing.

But Hudson wasn’t quite done his questions. He was trying to figure out why Jesus hasn’t come over to play with him. So then he asked the next obvious question, “Daddy does Jesus have a car to drive or not?”

At first glance this question seems almost silly. We chuckle, and we grin. I sure did as my son asked me that question. Hudson wanted to know if Jesus lacked transportation and if that’s stopping him from coming over.

And so we chuckle a bit because the question seems so silly doesn’t it…because Jesus doesn’t need a car to visit us. It seems funny to think of Jesus needing a car, except that is exactly what the incarnation teaches us. That Jesus is human and experienced our needs as we do.

The point is, we are so accustomed to thinking of Jesus as the divine Son of God, that we forget or dimish his humanity. But if we forget Jesus’ humanity – Jesus quickly becomes distant, unapproachable, and irrelevant to our lives. So Hudson isn’t too far off in his question. He is trying to relate Jesus to his world, where people drive cars, play race cars, and watch TV. Hudson is just reminding us of Jesus’ humanity, which is something we need to be reminded of.

We do not simply follow a God who pretended to be like us, but one who became one of us. He became one of us, so we could become like him. This is just a good reminder that Jesus is both divine and human. We cannot forget either fact. To miss out on either side, is to miss out on who Jesus is. So I’m not sure how Jesus would get around today, but what I am sure of is that he would want to come over and play race cars with Hudson. So that’s what I told him, and then we made “vroom vroom” sounds for the rest of the afternoon.

No Sun, No Anger

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On Sunday we looked at the topic of anger. And, in general, I think anger is something we live with, rather than deal with in our lives. But I believe it is something that needs to be dealt out. The more we deal with anger, and learn to live free from anger the wholer and more healthy our relationships. Anger severs relationships, anger kills friendships, and anger wrecks families and connections. And while we often try to control it, manage, or curb it – I believe we can live free from it if we deal with it.

So that’s what we looked at on Sunday. And I began by reading a quote from Dallas Willard who writes this, “He says that anger primarily happens when our will’s or desires are limited or stopped.” And I think this is true. Anger is triggered when our will’s or desires are stopped or limited. Think about a child in the grocery store not getting what they want, and throwing a tantrum (why do they have candy so close to the cart in checkouts…?). The point is that anger alerts us to the fact that what we want, isn’t happening. That’s at the root of what anger is and what it does.

And Paul is clear, this immediate feeling of anger isn’t wrong or bad. It’s simply a natural response. And it is not a sin. What matters is our response to this feeling of anger. Do we indulge it, entertain it, stoke it, or deal with it. Paul says this in Ephesians 4:25, “In your anger do not sin”. The problem isn’t the anger; the problem is how we deal with the anger. We all get angry, but our responses to anger determine the health of our relationships.

Paul continues saying, “Do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not make room for the devil”. And what he is teaching is really clear: anger undealt with gives the enemy room to move. Anger that isn’t dealt with gives the enemy a foothold. Anger that isn’t dealt with grows, festers, and gets ready to burst out.

This is the difficulty with anger; we simply don’t honestly deal with it. We shove it down, ignore it, or pretend it isn’t there. All the while it’s growing, lurking, and getting ready to explode. If you have ever seen someone explode over something minor (a parking spot, a thing a work, or at a sporting event), they do this not because that one event made them angry. They do this because a whole series, or months, or years of events have made them angry that they haven’t dealt with. Whenever anyone overreacts and explodes, it’s not because they’ve had a bad day, it’s because they’ve had a string of bad days that haven’t been dealt with. The anger is just there bubbling and boiling below the surface waiting for any one thing to release it. In a word, when we don’t deal with anger, it becomes chronic.

Anger is dangerous because it becomes a habit or an indulgence we can’t control. Dallas Willard puts it this way. He says we cannot stop the feelings of anger that arise in certain situations. But he says this:

But we can and usually do choose or will to be angry. But we can actively receive it and decide to indulge it, and we usually do. We may even become an angry person, and any incident can evoke from us a torrent of rage that is kept in constant readiness.”

This is why we need to deal with anger, so that it doesn’t control us and lurk below the surface.

So on Sunday we ended by looking at how to live free from anger. We focused on taking Paul’s advice, “Don’t let the sun go down on your anger”. Deal with it instead. Because if you go to bed angry, you just wake up with a low-level frustration and a distinct lack of desire to deal with the issues. And this happens all the time especially in marriages. So Paul’s advice is this: deal with the anger. And he gives us a time limit – you have till bed-time to make some progress with it. Deal with it that day because if you don’t, you won’t.

We gave some simple suggestions for how to deal with anger. First, learn to name why you angry. This is actually harder than it sounds because usually there is something beneath the obvious answer. We aren’t angry our spouse didn’t take out the garbage, we’re angy we had to ask 8 times and don’t feel like they follow through. We aren’t angry our kids spent that extra $20 we are upset they weren’t responsible. We need to learn to name why we are really angry if we want to deal with it.

The second step is to choose the right time to deal with anger. This is never when someone just walks in from work, while you drop them off at school, or at a party with friends. The point is that we need to choose times when we can honestly work it through. If its important enough to bring up, its important enough to find the right time to bring it up.

And lastly we need to ready to give it up. Sometimes we honestly like being angry. We like the feeling of self-righteousness it brings. We want the other person to hurt like we did, so we hold onto the anger and refuse to reconcile and forgive. So we need to ask before we bring up an issue, “are we ready to leave this behind?” It’s a good question to get in the habit of asking.

So we gave those three steps deal with it the day of by: naming it, choosing the right time to deal with it, and being ready to get rid of it. And if we do that I think we’ll have not only fuller lives, but fuller relationships.

Sermon Notes:

Big Idea: Don’t let the sun go down on your anger

Take Aways…

  • Anger is something that we seem to live with, rather than deal with
  • “Don’t sin by letting anger control you.”
  • “Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil”. Epehesiasn 4:25
  • Anger is the response we have to when our will’s are stopped.
  • The issue isn’t whether we feel angry, the issue is how we respond to that feeling.
  • Anger becomes chronic, when not dealt with
  • “But we can and usually do choose or will to be angry. But we can actively receive it and decide to indulge it, and we usually do. We may even become an angry person, and any incident can evoke from us a torrent of rage that is kept in constant readiness”. Dallas Willard
  • Don’t let the sun go down on your anger
  • Deal with it that day, because if you don’t – you won’t.
  • There is nothing that can be done with anger that cannot be done better without it
  • Steps away from Anger: Name it, Choose the right time to deal with it, be ready to get rid of it

Adult / Group Discussion Questions: What stuck out to you from the sermon? What was challenging to you? How did God speak to you through it? What was new? Have you ever seen someone explode over something minor before? How did you feel or what did you think when you saw it happen? Would you say anger is a real temptation for you? Why or why not? What do you think of Dallas Willard’s quote, there is nothing that can be done with anger that cannot be done better without it. Do you believe it is true? Is there anything anger in your life you need to deal with today? How can you deal with it well?

Discussion Questions / Actions for Young Families: Today talk to your kids abour anger. Today is a great day if there have been times where yelling, and anger have been pretty prevalent to ask for forgiveness. Share with them what you learned bout anger, and how you want to live differently. Talk to your kids about the principle of “dealing with your anger in the day” and that’s how you want the family to run. That if they are angry to come talk, to get it out in the open and deal with it. Don’t let anger fester.

Challenge for this Week: Deal with the anger that day

Learning to Deal with Anger

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On Sunday we are looking at a topic we’ve looked at before here, but one that needs to be addressed often. We are looking at anger.

And this is a really important topic because as Jesus teaches us anger is like murder (Matthew 5). And what Jesus is trying to get at in that teaching is that anger, just like  murder, can actually kill relationships. Anger can fracture friendships. Anger can wreck families.

And I think we know this and have experienced this before.

But the other side of the coin is this, anger is a feeling we have when our wills get stopped. We get angry when what we want doesn’t happen. In this way then anger is a natural response to the world around us. Paul says in Ephesians 4 in your anger do not sin. Meaning that anger isn’t a sin, our response to anger can determine whether we sin or not.

The point is that if we respond poorly to anger, it will lead to a severing of relationships like Jesus said. If we indulge and cultivate anger it will lead to a fracturing of families like Jesus said.

So on Sunday we want to look at how to deal with anger, how do we respond to anger, and what advice does the Bible give on how to do this. That’s where we are going and I think it’s an important topic. Because if you want to have healthy relationships we need to learn to deal with anger and conflict. So that’s this Sunday and if you want to read ahead – why not start with Ephesians 4. There is some real wisdom in there we’ll be drawing from.

Theological Weaponry and Words

901898_95139400I read this the other day and it really struck me. “I don’t think God is glorified by tightly crafted argument wielded as weaponry.” Sarah Bessey 

Sarah was commenting on how we seek to craft our theological arguments into weapons that win the argument, break the defense of others, and cause harm. I think this is both sad and true.

So often when God enters into the conversation, rather than discussion and sharing, we debate and argue.

Now don’t get me wrong I love theology, I love debating, and wrestling with God and theological issues. The point is that there is often a point in a conversation where it becomes less about wrestling with an idea or with God, and more about wrecking another person’s views.

I’m not saying that I believe everyone has a right or correct view. But so often rather than trying to help one another grow, we try to show through our intellectual prowess, mastery of theological language, or biblical understanding that our position is not only better – that your position is stupid, small, and clearly wrong. That you, as a person, are clearly stupid, small, and wrong for believing…whatever.

The point is that we argue not to grow in theological understanding; so often we argue to prove we are better than someone else. And I agree with Sarah, God is not pleased when we try to prove our worth by proving someone else’s deficiency whether that is in relation to morals, actions, or theological belief.

So I’m all for wrestling, discussion, and growing. I just want there to be grace and love in the midst of dialogue and debate. Because the truth is I hold my beliefs strongly, and I think you should too. Let’s just make sure that our strongly held beliefs don’t slide over from being strongly held to violently pushed, coercively driven, and hatefully argued.

Modern Family

On Sunday we are starting a brand new series called Modern Family. The whole point will be to see how we can have the healthiest families possible. And I want to define “family” as broadly as I can. Family are the people you consider family. For some of us that means a more traditional style of family perhaps like mine – a wife and two kids. For you it might mean an adoptive parent, a group of such close friends they aren’t friends anymore but family.

The point is that we are all journeying with people whom we have relationships with. And with these key relationships how can we make them as healthy and as whole as possible? That’s the point of this series. So however you define your family, I want to explore how to make it as good as possible.

Because I know two things about “family”. First, is that families and their structure are incredibly diverse today. So I want to recognize and appreciate that. Second, is that all families at some point are dysfunctional. By that I mean all families at some point struggle, have tension and difficulty to work through.

So that’s what I want to look at how to ensure that we know how to work through the difficulty, tension, and struggle we have in our family structures, looking at it from God’s perspective. So whether you are single, a grandparent, parent, or whatever, I want to look at how we can have the best relationships with those closest to us.

So that’s where we are going and on Sunday we are going to look at one question.

How can we be extraordinary?

And I think it’s a good place to start.

modern family

The Temptation When Your Tired

897022_75787639I’m tired. And when I’m tired I get tempted, by probably the biggest temptation I face on a daily basis.

I get tempted to forget that God is good.

When I get tired, when I get busy, when I’m in the nitty gritty of life and ministry there is a temptation to forget that God is good. To forget that God is faithful. To forget that God will come through.

When we get busy, tired, or in a dark or difficult place the temptation is to start to believe our doubts, or even to just let the doubts linger too long. That things won’t get better, that things won’t work out, that this time we fail beyond recovery, that this time we won’t find a way out. We start to forget that God is faithful, good, and full of grace. We forget that God is with us. We forget that God will never leave us. We forget that even when we feel tired, worn out, and unsure – God is steady, strong, and there for us.

But we need to remember and rest in the truth of the gospel: that God is good. That God is true. That God is here for us. We must fight the temptation to disbelieve and doubt in the goodness of God. No matter how our lives seem to conspire sometimes to cloud the fact that God is good, we need to continually come back to this fact.

And this isn’t about just positive thinking, it’s about resting in reality. And reality, as the Bible shapes it is this: God is good, God is faithful, and God is there.

 

So no matter where you are today know this God is good. And he never ever lets go. And that hopefully should give us enough to keep going today.

Resurrection Changes Everything

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Sunday was Easter. The biggest day of the year for Christians. Because on this day 2000 years ago all of life was changed. On this day 2000 years ago death was beaten. On this day 2000 years ago darkness was beaten. On this day 2000 years ago sin was beaten.

In short, Jesus won and life overcame the darkness. 

And this is radical, momentous, and something I can’t even put into words. Yet the significance of this day is something that seems to get overshadowed by bunnies, Easter eggs, and a familiarity with this death-shattering day. Our familiarity with Easter causes it to lose some of its power.

So on Sunday I talked about resurrection. Because Paul makes a radical and life-changing statement: “that the same power that raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you”

Do you understand how utterly life-altering that one statement is?

The power that broke death…is in you.

The power that trampled evil…is in you.

The power that conquered all darkness, sin, difficulty, and disease…is in you.

Paul’s point is that resurrection isn’t just something that happened 2000 years ago, resurrection is something that is happening now. The same power that raised Jesus, that resurrected him, is in you.

So on Sunday we asked the radical question: what does God want to resurrect in us? Because Easter isn’t just that some guy was raised from the dead. Easter is about the fact that Jesus, the Son of God, was raised from the dead and  now that power dwells in us.

Jonathon Martin writes this,

Resurrection changes everything. If that man could get back up, anybody could get up. If hope died and came back to life, then hope can rise again for the whole world. If even God can die but come back to life, then anyone can come back to life.

That was our main point on Sunday: resurrection changes everything.

Resurrection changes everything. We live in a world strangled by the language and reality of death. We see dreams die, relationships fracture, hopes crushed, and lives defeated. Yet resurrection says – new life is possible, new hope is possible, a new reality is not only possible but here. Because resurrection changes everything.

So on Sunday we asked one simple but life changing question: what do you want to resurrect in our lives Jesus? If resurrection isn’t something that just happened, but can happen today – what does that look like in our lives?

And while I don’t know what that might specifically look like  in your life I know some things about it. Areas in your life where death reigns, where darkness covers hope, where defeat directs your life, where fear rules, where sin shames – do not need to stay that way. Resurrection happened and resurrection is happening.

So today if yesterday just slipped by like any other day, why go one more day without resurrection in your life? Go to Jesus, he is alive, he is risen, and he has resurrection power he wants to give to you. Why not go to him and see what he might do in your life? Because 2000 years ago life burst from a death-filled ground, and it changes everything…

Sermon Notes:

Big Idea:Resurrection changes everything…

Take Aways…

+  Resurrection means that new life can begin, even out of death.

+  Jesus, what do you want to resurrect today?

+  Entropy is a law of nature in which everything slowly goes into disorder.

+  Another important point is that Jesus’ death was a political death. If you ask one of the crucial theological questions – why was Jesus killed? – the answer isn’t “Because God want us to love one another.” Why in the world would anyone kill Jesus for that? That’s stupid. Its not even interesting. Why did Jesus get killed? Because he challenged the powers that be – Stanley Hauerwas

+  Fear’s a powerful thing / It can turn your heart black, that you can trust / It’ll take your God-filled soul / And fill it with devil’s and dust. – Bruce Springsteen

+  “What we have then in the apostolic circle, is a group of disillusioned, frightened, guilty, mournful, semi-traitors” – James Allison

+  “Resurrection changes everything. If that man could get back up, anybody could get up. If hope died and came back to life, then hope can rise again for the whole world. If even God can die but come back to life, then anyone can come back to life. Jonathon Martin

+  Resurrection changes everything…

+  Death can do its worst, and Jesus will do his thing

+  What is it you need resurrected in your life? And are you ready to receive it today?

Adult / Group Discussion Questions: What stuck out to you from the sermon? What was challenging to you? How did God speak to you through it? What was new? In what ways is your life under the “shadow of death”? Can you relate to the disciples feeling full of fear? Talk about the quote from Jonathon Martin. How does resurrection change everything? How has resurrection changed your life? How might God want to change your life today? What do you need Jesus’ resurrection power to touch in your life today?

Discussion Questions / Actions for Young Families: Today talk to you kids about what Easter is. Share with them that Easter means that when things seem darkest and most difficult – Jesus can show up and change everything. Talk to them about how fear holds us back, but God wants to take away our fear. Ask them if there is anything in their life they need Jesus to help them with – and then believe and pray about it. Jesus resurrection power isn’t just for adults, its for everyone. 

Challenge for this Week: Live in Jesus’ resurrection power

 

Death, Darkness, and “Good Friday”

Today is Good Friday.  But that is a really bad name, for a very terrible day. “Good Friday” is only a day that is only good in hindsight, and even then it’s obscured through darkness, pain and difficulty.

Today is the day that Jesus entered fully into our darkness to provide a way out. Today is the day the light of the world was snuffed out. Today is the day that darkness seemed to win. Today is the day that the Messiah died.

It’s today that when we look upon Jesus and his sacrifice we realize how unable we are to make our lives work as we would want. We see our struggle for coherence, meaning, and power. We see in Jesus’ naked body nailed to the cross our own betrayals of friends and family. We see how our desire to create empires of meaning and worth are empty, and filled with dust and dirt. We ask ourselves “what have we become”?

Bruce Springsteen once sang,

Fear’s a powerful thing, baby
It can turn your heart black you can trust
It’ll take your God filled soul
And fill it with devils and dust

And on this day so many years ago – the disciples hearts were filled with devils and dust. Their God-filled soul, seemed empty, as they watched the Son of God die on a piece of wood. The point is that today is not a “good” day.

For three days doubt, darkness and death reign.

So today is not an easy day. Today is not a good day. Today is though a necessary day.

Today, like on a day many years ago Jesus’ body was broken, like bread, so that we might be made whole.  Jesus poured his life out, like wine, as a sacrifice for our sins. Jesus gave up his life so that we might find it.

This is the message of today: life, breath, blood and brokenness all mix together so that in the end death might be beaten. But on this day we remember that before death was beaten, it seemed as if it had won. Before darkness lost its final battle, the light of the world was lost. So today we remember that before light and love burst forth…they went through death and darkness…

Deadly Theological Training

I came across a quote a little while ago that has really stuck with me. Richard Rohr says this:

“Theological training without spiritual experience is deadly”.

And I think that is bang on. Whenever our theological knowledge outpaces our practice we have problems. And in general, as has often been said, I think so often our Christian culture is educated beyond their level of obedience. And this is deadly. Whenever we know more than we practice, our knowledge can become sharp and hurtful. Our practice can seem weak and hypocritical.

Now if you know me, I’m not against theological training or knowledge at all. My wife says I have a “reading problem” (which means I have too many books to keep in our house). So I’m not against learning, depth, and training. But learning, depth, and training that doesn’t flow out into practice becomes stagnant, stale, and sometimes toxic.

So all of this is to say one thing: learn more, and practice more. Let your faith grow deeper, and let your practice grow truer. Because people who know lots about Jesus don’t change the world; the world is changed by people who know, and follow Jesus.

Ridding Pride From Our Lives

On Sunday we tackeled the topic of pride. This is a hard topic because to be honest, in general, I think we try to live with balanced pride. We don’t want to live without it. We don’t want too much of it, but we also don’t want to get rid of it from our lives.

So I began by exploring what pride is. Pride is really misplaced, perverted, and self-directed love. St. Augustine defined pride as “the love of one’s own excellence”. It’s love that is inward rather than outward. And in many ways that’s exactly what pride is: a vortex that makes all affection and love about you. Pride is self-interested and  self-centered.

So with this understanding why on earth do we want to have anything to do with pride?

I think the reason we still try to balance and have just enough pride in our lives is this: in our culture we believe we need pride to succeed. That somehow without pride we won’t have any self-esteem, ability, or success in life. On Sunday I made a different case that we don’t need pride to succeed, we need humility.

Pride is based on false premises. It promotes our perfection and hides our flaws. It self-promotes our preferred version of ourselves, regardless of how true it is or isn’t. This is why pride is never a basis for healthy self-esteem: because it’s never based on the truth.

Will Willimon wrote: “To tell you the truth, I can’t think of much that is wrong with a healthy – within limits – sense of Pride, other than that Jesus was against it.”

I think that’s true. So we dove into how if Jesus didn’t display pride, how we might live like him free from it.

Where we landed was pretty simple: turn down pride and invest in humility. Jesus, when we he was tempted by the Devil in the desert, had his pride tested, poked, and prodded each time. But Jesus didn’t give in. He turned down pride, and instead invested in humility

We ended with a few practical ways to do this. The first, turning glory back to God. So often we want the glory for ourselves, but the example of Jesus is to give it back to the Father. So we gave this simple challenge: track the goodness of God this week. Keep track of all that God does for us. As we recognize God’s involvement in our lives, we can give the praise and glory back to him. So our simple challenge was to sit down once everyday and reflect on how God has been active in our lives. This will remind us that our success is not all about us, but God living and moving in and through us.

So why not do that this week? It’s a great step to grow humility and root out pride.

Sermon Notes:

Big Idea: We need to live with humility, and root out pride.

Take Aways…

  • Pride is the great sin. C.S.Lewis
  • Pride isn’t something to be shunned anymore, it is something to be embraced in our culture.
  • Pride is misdirected, misplaced, and perverted love
  • Pride is vortex that makes love all about you.
  • “Pride is the love of one’s own excellence” St. Augustine
  • Pride is a social sin In our culture we believe we need pride to succeed.
  • The answer to our self-esteem issue, isn’t pride but humility The inward manifestation of pride leads a person to be obsessed with others and how they feel about him or her. Michael Mangis
  • We’re supposed to instill pride in our children to make them stable people. But humility works even better. Fredrica Matthews-Greeen
  • “Jesus encounters the temptation to Pride with his rejection and with his silence” Will Willimon
  • We need to live with humility, and root out pride.
  • We need to grow in our gratitude to God Pride takes all the credit for success, and blames everyone else for failure. We need to flip this around.

Adult / Group Discussion Questions: What stuck out to you from the sermon? What was challenging to you? How did God speak to you through it? What was new? How has pride ever wrecked a relationship you’ve been in? In what areas or ways do you struggle with pride? How can you grow in humility? Will you choose to track God’s goodness?

Discussion Questions / Actions for Young Families: Today talk to your kids about pride, and humility. Talk to them about being honest with who we are. But be proactive against pride, have them write out good things God has done for them this week. Have them make a picture, or share reasons for being thankful to God. The more they are rooted in that, the harder it will be for pride to take root.

Challenge for this Week Keep track of all the good God does for you this week