Tag: Life

Transforming not Transmitting Pain

I have one last quote to share before I move back to my regular blogging schedule and thoughts, now that I’m back from vacations. So here it is for a Monday morning.

“If you do not transform your pain, you will surely transmit it to those around you and even to the next generation. Suffering, of course, can lead you in either of two directions: It can make you very bitter and close you down, or it can make you wise, compassionate, and utterly open.” – Richard Rohr

The reality is we suffer. Life has struggles, ups and downs. But this quote reminds me it’s what I do in the struggles that counts. That’s why I like this quote, because it reminds me that what I’m going through doesn’t define me, my choices in the struggles define me.

So I like this quote because it reminds me that even out of bad things, God can bring something good…

by Andrew Mills

We need each other…

“We shall have to break our habit of having church in such a way that people are deceived into thinking that they can be Christians and remain strangers” – Stanley Hauweras and Will Willimon

I don’t have much to add other than its brilliant and true. We need each other. Christianity isn’t a faith done in isolation but in relationship with God and others. So next time you gather together, go and meet someone. Move past being strangers, and move into being true follower of Jesus.

by Andrew Mills

Hearing God’s Voice in Psalm 23 (A Targum and Prayer)

On Sunday we talked about how our God cares for us, provides for us, gives life, protection, and direction.

To end the sermon I read a paraphrase of Psalm 23 asking us to listen for God’s voice in the words. That as I read we would hear God speaking to us. And many people heard God’s voice.

So I thought why not do that again today.

Take a moment, put on some good music, have a cup of coffee and read this passage three times. And as you do, listen to God speaking to you, stirring something in you, listen to any words or phrases that resonate or stick with you. Why not take that as God speaking through his Holy Spirit to you today. And then give thanks to him that we have such a wonderful God.

  • The Lord is my shepherd
    • The one who watches over me
    • Who comes to seek and find me
    • The one whose voice I know within
  • With a Lord like this I don’t need a thing
    • You take care of my needs
    • Leading me to rest for my soul and body
    • You renew my strength
  • True to your word
    • You let me catch my breath
    • And send me in the right direction
    • Displaying your faithfulness at all times
  • Even when that way goes through Death Valley
    • When depression, darkness, and death stalk me
    • I will not be afraid – because you walk at my side
  • You never leave me in the darkness
    • You walk me through it
    • Your power, protection, and presence makes me feel secure
    • Knowing you are there to guide me
  • In the midst of calamity and onslaught
    • In front of my taunters, disbelievers, scoffers, and enemies
    • You come and prepare a full meal for me
  • Welcoming me into your home
    • Anointing my head with oil
    • Calming me, protecting me, and claiming me as yours and yours alone
  • My cup it brims with blessings
    • Your beauty and your love they chase after me every day of my life
    • Grace is pursuing me and life is coming
  • I’m back home in the house of God for the rest of my life
by Andrew Mills

Bringing a Smile with You

Have you ever met someone who just makes you smile every time you see them? Have you ever connected with a person who just makes you feel better after every conversation?

Some people have an amazing gift of making you smile. My wife took this picture of my son and I think it’s amazing.

Here he is literally carting a smile around on his tri-cycle. And when I think about Hudson, this is what he is like for me. He is constantly making me laugh. At any moment he can make me smile, by a phrase, or an action. He’s in the stage now where he asks “that funny?” at so many things.

And if you say, “Yes that was funny” he puts his head back like this picture and just laughs and laughs. It makes me laugh every moment, mostly because he always laugh’s now with a delay. A funny action will happen, he will ask about it, and then laugh.

The point is though that Hudson is so connected to life that he brings me life. He is so connected to happiness, that he brings smiles where ever he goes. And whether you realize this or not, this is a lot like Jesus.

Jesus says that he is the way, the truth, and the life. What that means is that he is life. When we get connected to him, we are literally connecting to life. So as Christians we too should be helping people around us connect with life. After our conversations with others, life, smiles, and grace should linger. We should be the type of people who help people to better connect to life and love because of our connection to God.

This doesn’t mean that sometimes we don’t have deep, honest, and sometimes even difficult conversations. It also doesn’t mean we paint a fake happy face on what we are going through. But, if we, as Christians, aren’t carrying around some deeper joy, some deep smiles, and deep sense of life, then we’re missing out. Because our Savior is the life, the joy, and the grace of the world. The closer we get connected to the life, the more it will spread out from us.

The question is, what lingers in your relationships because of you?

Hudson does have bad days. He has difficult moments. But he is so connected to Jesus, that more often than not he is carting around a smile in his little tri-cycle. More often than not he will ask “that funny?” and we’ll all laugh. More often than not he’s willing to throw back his head and spread joy. This is like Jesus and I think it should be like us too.

So this week if you’re having trouble smiling, Hudson is willing to let you borrow his tri-cycle. Because no one can ride that funny, small thing, without smiling…trust me I’ve tried… 😉

by Andrew Mills

Sex Talk in Church

So on Sunday we talked about sex. We talked about God’s perspective on it, trying to understand two questions: why was it given and what’s the basis for great sex?

Biblically, God’s design for sex is pretty clear – it’s to unite and connect. When God says a man leaves his father and mother and becomes “one flesh” with his wife in Genesis 2:24,what God is saying is that sex connects. That two people, two lives, two different beings become truly one in a deep sense. This isn’t just a physical oneness but a deep relational, spiritual, and emotional oneness. That’s the beauty of marriage and of sex.

The way then you have great sex is to focus on that oneness. Great sex doesn’t flow out of great desire. Great sex flows out of great intimacy. Relationships are built on intimacy, trust, and commitment, and when you have that – that’s when great sex happens. We read about it in Song of Songs 4:12 how the man says his sex was so great it was like cool, refreshing, living water. He says this happens because of the intimacy, the depth of connection, and the sacredness between him and his bride. Their choice to only choose each other generated deeper and better sex because of the intimacy and connection that was there.

So that’s what we looked at last Sunday, that sex connects, and great sex is based in great intimacy and commitment.

So this week no matter what stage and place you are in whether married, looking, or single and content, focus on building trust and intimacy in your friendships and relationships. Because that’s what really matters and that’s what makes a great friendship.

And lastly, if you want to hear my semi-awkward sharing on sex it will be posted under sermon download shortly. What you won’t get though is the visual of me turning red a few times!

by Andrew Mills

Overcoming Death

On Sunday we talked about death. We opened up a dialogue on an important topic that affects us all but is so foreign to us at the same time. After I shared on Sunday, a friend came up to me and said death is supposed to be foreign to us because death was never to be.

This is so true but is so often misunderstood. So often people think of death as part of God’s will and plan. But death has never been, and won’t ever be part of the plan of God. Jesus died to conquer death. Death is an enemy and not an agent or activity of God.

So on Sunday I shared from 1 Corinthians 15 where Paul writes that death is an enemy. And yes it is true that death is the last enemy as Paul put it, but death is not an enemy that lasts. There is a future rushing forward to meet us where death will be swallowed up whole (Is. 28:5), where every tear will be wiped away (Rev. 21:4), where all will be restored (Acts 3:21). This is the future that needs to shape us. But how do we do that? Well I have two suggestions. First, don’t let death count the time and second, we get through it together.

My dad died two years ago on Sunday. It feels as if I’ve lost him for two years. But this is counting time through the lens of death, rather than the future that is before me. Because in reality, I am now two years closer to being reunited with him. God’s future is two years closer to becoming a reality. And yes, the loss I feel is real, and it is deep. But the loss isn’t permanent. So while I wait I will remember that a future is coming where all will be restored.

But how do you get through the “waiting” or the space between now and the future? Well I believe you get through it together.  Andrew Root writes this, “God is present when death is shared, when suffering is joined”. So we get through to the future God has for us together. We share in the lives of each other refusing to let death have the last word. We remember memories, events, and people together.

So my sermon in one sentence was this: Death is wrong, death won’t last, and we get to the future promised to us together.

But sermons aren’t meant to just be heard, but to be lived. So this week why not go and join someone in their loss. Ask them about a loved one, send them a prayer, or mark a memory. Go and join someone and bring God with you…

Discussion Questions

  • Questions for Adults: How have you viewed death growing up? What part struck you most about the sermon today? Is there anyone that you’ve been separated from because of death? How does today’s sermon help you in that separation? How can you help others who have recently experienced the separation of death?
  • Questions for Young Families: Why is do you think that death is hard? Are you scared of death at all? Share how Jesus promises that death will never win, and that he gives us life.
  • Challenge for this Week: Walk with others in your community and neighborhood who have experienced loss
by Andrew Mills

Silencing Death and Learning to Speak

On Sunday I’m going to be preaching about death. In preperation for Sunday I thought I’d write a brilliant series of blog posts on death. But the reality is I’m struggling to simply write just this one…

Eberhard Jüngel wrote,  “Death is mute, and renders us speechless.” That’s what I’m feeling. I’m feeling speechless, drained, and unsure of what to say. This is why I hate death; it simply takes too much…

So why write at all? Why preach on death? Why not just talk about something else?

Well, because then death would win. When we refuse to talk about it, to enter into it, or to journey with people struggling with it, death wins because it separates us, it isolates us, and leaves us speechless. So on Sunday I’m not going to let death win and together we are going to talk about death. We are going to explore why death happens, what death really is, how you get through it, and how you can face it.

I know for some in our congregation this topic will hit very close to home. It will for me as well, because Sunday is the anniversary of my dad’s death 2 years ago. Krista asked me, wouldn’t I rather just take the Sunday off and be by myself? And the anwser is no. I won’t let death stop me from doing what I love – preaching. I won’t let death stop me from following my calling. And I won’t let death separate me on a hard day from the family and church that I love. Death has already taken too much, and I won’t let it take anymore.

So Sunday we will stop death from rendering us speechless. We will talk about it, heal through it, and discover that death is the last enemy, but it is not an enemy that lasts…

And who knows maybe next week I’ll have something brilliant to write. Being honest and open will have to do for today…

by Andrew Mills

Guest Blogger: My Wife! Lessons Learned as a Mom

Since Andrew got me to be our guest speaker yesterday at church, he also thought that it would only appropriate that I also be a Guest Blogger for today. I made the comment yesterday that I think that since I am doing his job, he should have come into my office and do mine for a day – and I am still holding onto that idea!

Yesterday we had a fantastic Mother’s Day celebration including a baby dedication and home-made gift giving. Andrew and I also got to share something super exciting with the church family – that we are going to become a family of four sometime early November!

We are very excited to welcome our little boy or girl into our family and as well into our Plattsville Church family too!

After sharing this exciting news, I talked about a few things that I have learned about God as a mom, things that I have been taught my whole life, but have been made real through the ups and downs of being a mom.  If you feel brave, you can listen to it online it will be posted later on this week here. However, I am nervous to even encourage this idea as this was my first time speaking and I was a wee bit nervous – but if you dare, you can hear all about these lessons of God through experiences and stories of my little man, Hudson.

I have been so blessed through this small little boy since the moment he was born. We are blessed that Andrew’s dad was able to be a grandpa for three short months.

We are blessed that he is going to be a great Big Brother. I know that Andrew feels blessed that his first word was ‘Ball’, and how he loves to play soccer. And for me, I feel blessed that through loving this little boy, I have learned to love and lean on God like I never have before and decided to share more about this with you all.

I shared on how God’s love is unconditional and that He is concerned with every detail of our lives. I shared on how we are to depend on Him and that he indeed feels all the same pain and sympathizes with us. And I said that for all these things, God first wants us to want Him. These simple concepts, ones that we may have been taught our whole lives, have taken on a new meaning through my little boy. Take a moment and think back to when God has shown you his love, mercy, compassion and desire to be with you, think of a time when you felt God’s presence beside you or His arms around you as you cried. Take a moment to just sit and thank God for being there during these moments, making Himself real to you. He wants to be with you, during the good times, and also during the times when you would rather that He was far away – He is still there.

So that’s what I’ve learned about God through being a parent. But what about you? What have learned about God from being a parent, through a parent, or though an adopted “parent” in your life? Because the beauty of our faith is that we learn from each other, and discover a God worth knowing…

by Andrew Mills

Thomas the Train Meet Jurgen Moltmann

Hudson is a gift. Yet in life it is easy to miss the gifts all around us isn’t it.

I looked at the book I was reading at home and found this.

Yes that’s right its covered in Thomas the Train stickers. Life with a 2 year old.

But the odd juxtaposition got me to thinking. Here is a deep theolgoical work covered in stickers from my two year old. A book that is centered on deeply exploring the gift of life Jesus gives us, is covered with trains with names like Thomas and Percy. This odd combination though reminds me that while it is important to learn, it is better to live.

This little act by little boy reminds me that my faith is not lived out through reading theology, deep thinking, or even reading the Bible. My faith is lived out in my actions. Through putting stickers all over my house with my little boy I’m demonstrating love. Through meeting with friends laughing and enjoying life I’m living out the Kingdom. Through eating and enjoying a meal with my wife I’m practicing faith. Life is a gift. And while it is important to refelct on life, and to deeply think about God sometiems we can get so caught up reflecting that we forget to appreciate the gift of life.

So today put down the book. Put down the thoughts of work that cross your mind. Put down the worries about the future. Put down whatever you might be holding and enjoy life. Play with your kids, go out with friends, cook a brilliant meal. And maybe if your adventuresome put stickers all over the place…

by Andrew Mills

Learning to Forgive

Forgiveness is really hard to do. I mean true forgiveness is extremely difficult to give and to do.

Forgiveness is easy:

  • When the person realizes the hurt they caused
  • When they feel regret, and a sense of responsibility over the hurt
  • When they ask for it and truly mean it
  • When they learn from the mistake and don’t repeat it.

When all of those things happen forgiveness seems almost natural and it is almost easy.

But what about when those things don’t happen? How do you forgive when someone doesn’t want it? How do you forgive when someone doesn’t even think what they did was wrong? How do you forgive when someone intentionally hurts you and is happy about it?

It is in those instances that forgiveness is truly tough. We know holding onto hurt for years just causes bitterness and isn’t healthy. But the other option of just forgetting about it and letting it go doesn’t seem to do justice to the depth of hurt we feel. So we end up with two options that aren’t helpful or healthy. We can either hold onto it, or forget about it when really what we want is to deal with it. But how do you deal with it when the other person or party doesn’t care and doesn’t want to?

This is the complexity of forgiveness. This is the importance of the topic and on Sunday we’re taking a look at how to practice forgiveness in the truly tough situations. But before we get there have you ever had to forgive in a difficult situation? How did you do it? What helped and how did God work in you to heal?

And for all we still hold onto, on Sunday we’re going to explore how to give it to God…

by Andrew Mills