“Daddy I’m Not Special Because You Love Me”

1470072_10153676442255643_402969151_nA few days ago I was talking with my three-year old. And sometimes I think three-year olds should be in charge because in their simplicity and understanding they are brilliant. But, of course, if they were in charge we’d probably have to watch more Dora than we’d want to but that’s a side point.

As I was talking with Hudson I told him he is so special and loved by mommy and daddy. And he got mad. Down right angry. And he told me, “No daddy I’m not special because you love me”. And I started to get a little frustrated that it kind of felt like he was rejecting a bit of my care and love for him. So I told him, “No you are special because daddy and mommy love you and will always love you no matter what.” And he said again “No daddy I’m not special beause you love me” And he started stomping his feet.

Just as I was feeling a little inwardly unsure about what to do, Hudson said this. “Daddy I’m special because God loves me, mommy told  me that. God loves me, made me, so I’m special”.

See three year olds can be brilliant – right?

And Hudson is right. That is the foundation for why we are all special, unique, and valued. And I pray to God that he will never ever forget that foundation. I pray that he holds onto that truth for every day of his entire life. I pray that he will never seek to find his validation in love from anyone else, from anything else, or from any other substitute. I pray that he will know he is special, matters, and has value because God loves him.

If you think about how might our lives be different if we would have just held onto that truth?

How might decisions in high school have been different, if we knew with such conviction, like Hudson, that we matter because of God? How might our decisions in our marriage, in our jobs, and in our families be different if we were so secure in God’s love for us?

So on that day Hudson taught me something important. He is special because God loves him, and so am I, and so are you.

“Daddy Watch Me! – I’m Going to Do Something Crazy!”

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I love my little boys. They are a wonderful part of my life. Asher saunters / stumbles to me everytime I walk in the door. Hudson runs at me full tilt and jumps when I walk in the door. Often it’s a 50/50 chance whether Hudson will hit Asher while they both walk to me. Being a dad is a really beautiful thing.

But I have noticed something about Hudson, especially recently. He often says this to me, “Dad watch me!”

  • Dad watch me as I jump off this couch
  • Dad watch me I’m doing something crazy
  • Dad watch me and see me write my name
  • Dad watch me as I jump over Asher…

The point is that Hudson loves having my attention. In fact, if he could have my attention all the time – that’s exactly what he would want. And I think wanting our parent’s caring, loving, and attentive gaze is important and natural. Hudson wants me to be part of his world. He wants to experience his world with me. It’s not enough for him to jump over Asher unless I’m watching, laughing, cheering him on, and entering into it.

And I think we want the same thing often as well. We want people to experience life with us, to enter into our worlds and join us there. We like knowing we matter.

But here is the beautiful thing, we have this with God.

The Father’s attention is always turned to you, you never have to say to him “Watch me”, “Pay attention” “This is important”. Because to God everything you do is important, because you are important.

God wants to enter our world and experience it with us.

The question is are we letting him? The question is are we truly deeply aware of how much we matter to our heavenly father.

As a father I’d love to give Hudson and Asher all of my attention all the time. But sometimes I forget what a gift it is to have God’s attention all the time. We never turn to him and find him turned away but ready to enter our world, our conversation, our experiences with him.

So this week as you live, remember you are living with a caring Father right there with you. Because he loves you.