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Kissing Dirty Faces

Today I started thinking about messiness, and dirtiness. I am someone who likes a clean world. And I don’t really like messiness in general. But today my little boy ran up to me when I came home saying “Daddy, Daddy, Daddy” wanting a big hug and kiss.

The only thing was he had a really snotty face, his mouth was full of cookie, and when he gives kisses they are big open mouthed kisses. So did I ask him to clean his face first? No, of course not. I gave him a big kiss, runny nose and all.

The reason this struck me is because we all seem to have different tolerances of “dirtiness” in our lives. But the interesting thing is that depending on the person, our tolerance of dirtiness changes. Hudson running with a dirty face for a kiss gets one, if it was someone else it might not have happened. The point is that our acceptance of “messiness” affects relationships.

Do we allow people to enter our worlds who aren’t clean, perfect, and orderly? Do we actually invite people who are different, messy, and maybe even dirty and unkempt to journey with us? Would we be willing to kiss a dirty face?

This might seem like an odd question, but for the people of God it is a crucial question. The question of acceptance is critical for the church because Jesus demonstrates a radical acceptance of people just as they are. Jesus kisses people with dirty faces, and even dirty feet. People don’t need to change or to be cleaned up to come to Jesus or join his followers. Tax collectors, lepers, and prostitutes came and joined his group as they were without change. Jesus seems to be okay with a bit of dirt, and messiness. The question is are we?

Do we allow people to join with us, and belong without being clean? Do we expect people to behave like Christians before learning to following Jesus with us? Are we okay with some messiness, dirt, and grime in church? These are the questions we, as Christians, need to answer because if Jesus is okay with some messiness, we need to be too.

You know what made the difference for me allowing me to kiss my son’s dirty face? The simple fact that I deeply love him. Love changes how we see people. Love changes how we see messy lives, and broken hearts. Love looks past the outside, the dirt, the sin, the brokenness, and sees someone worth loving. That’s how Jesus sees us and we need to see people in the same way.

So the final question is this: are you looking on people with love? Do you see people as Jesus does? Are your actions those of Jesus, accepting people as they are and welcoming them in? Does who you welcome, and hang out with look like the same people Jesus welcomed and spends time with? Because if we want to learn to follow Jesus, we need to start being like Jesus. Spending time with dirty and broken people.

I can tell you when we start doing that we’ll discover Jesus in our midst. If you want to find Jesus, you need to go where he hangs out; and Jesus has always hung out where people with messy lives and dirty faces are. So why not join Jesus there, loving, accepting, and kissing a dirty face or two…

by Andrew Mills

Guest Blogger: My Wife! Lessons Learned as a Mom

Since Andrew got me to be our guest speaker yesterday at church, he also thought that it would only appropriate that I also be a Guest Blogger for today. I made the comment yesterday that I think that since I am doing his job, he should have come into my office and do mine for a day – and I am still holding onto that idea!

Yesterday we had a fantastic Mother’s Day celebration including a baby dedication and home-made gift giving. Andrew and I also got to share something super exciting with the church family – that we are going to become a family of four sometime early November!

We are very excited to welcome our little boy or girl into our family and as well into our Plattsville Church family too!

After sharing this exciting news, I talked about a few things that I have learned about God as a mom, things that I have been taught my whole life, but have been made real through the ups and downs of being a mom.  If you feel brave, you can listen to it online it will be posted later on this week here. However, I am nervous to even encourage this idea as this was my first time speaking and I was a wee bit nervous – but if you dare, you can hear all about these lessons of God through experiences and stories of my little man, Hudson.

I have been so blessed through this small little boy since the moment he was born. We are blessed that Andrew’s dad was able to be a grandpa for three short months.

We are blessed that he is going to be a great Big Brother. I know that Andrew feels blessed that his first word was ‘Ball’, and how he loves to play soccer. And for me, I feel blessed that through loving this little boy, I have learned to love and lean on God like I never have before and decided to share more about this with you all.

I shared on how God’s love is unconditional and that He is concerned with every detail of our lives. I shared on how we are to depend on Him and that he indeed feels all the same pain and sympathizes with us. And I said that for all these things, God first wants us to want Him. These simple concepts, ones that we may have been taught our whole lives, have taken on a new meaning through my little boy. Take a moment and think back to when God has shown you his love, mercy, compassion and desire to be with you, think of a time when you felt God’s presence beside you or His arms around you as you cried. Take a moment to just sit and thank God for being there during these moments, making Himself real to you. He wants to be with you, during the good times, and also during the times when you would rather that He was far away – He is still there.

So that’s what I’ve learned about God through being a parent. But what about you? What have learned about God from being a parent, through a parent, or though an adopted “parent” in your life? Because the beauty of our faith is that we learn from each other, and discover a God worth knowing…

by Andrew Mills

Mother’s Day = No Preaching for Andrew

I love to preach. I really enjoy it. I think about it plan it out and try to do my best.

But this week I get a break. Because this week another Mills’ is preaching for Mother’s Day ~ my wife Krista.

So this week I got to see her try to put together a sermon, a teaching, or a talk. I got to see her struggle a bit and realize that it isn’t easy to do each and every week. The best part was when she was struggling to find a verse and asked me. I immediatley answered and told her the chapter and verse. She was initally shocked and then said “oh right of course you’d know – you read the Bible for a living.” Not quite true but a funny comment nevertheless.

The reason I’m looking forward to Sunday so much is because I get to see my wife speak. But even more than that the Bible is clear that God is speaking to each of us. God is teaching each of us, and a part of all of our lives. So the real reason I’m excited for Sunday is to learn. I’m excited to see what being a mother has taught Krista about God, because I want to grow through her expereince. That’s what being a part of a community is about growing not only together but through each other as well. So on Sunday we’ll be growing togehter through my wife’s teaching on teh God who is a part of all our lives.

And so if you come on Sunday please be sure to do one thing for me. Please smile lots because Krista’s a bit nervous…but she doesn’t have need to be. Speaking’s part of our family…

by Andrew Mills

Thomas the Train Meet Jurgen Moltmann

Hudson is a gift. Yet in life it is easy to miss the gifts all around us isn’t it.

I looked at the book I was reading at home and found this.

Yes that’s right its covered in Thomas the Train stickers. Life with a 2 year old.

But the odd juxtaposition got me to thinking. Here is a deep theolgoical work covered in stickers from my two year old. A book that is centered on deeply exploring the gift of life Jesus gives us, is covered with trains with names like Thomas and Percy. This odd combination though reminds me that while it is important to learn, it is better to live.

This little act by little boy reminds me that my faith is not lived out through reading theology, deep thinking, or even reading the Bible. My faith is lived out in my actions. Through putting stickers all over my house with my little boy I’m demonstrating love. Through meeting with friends laughing and enjoying life I’m living out the Kingdom. Through eating and enjoying a meal with my wife I’m practicing faith. Life is a gift. And while it is important to refelct on life, and to deeply think about God sometiems we can get so caught up reflecting that we forget to appreciate the gift of life.

So today put down the book. Put down the thoughts of work that cross your mind. Put down the worries about the future. Put down whatever you might be holding and enjoy life. Play with your kids, go out with friends, cook a brilliant meal. And maybe if your adventuresome put stickers all over the place…

by Andrew Mills

Learning to Forgive – Learning to Send Away

On Sunday we talked about forgiveness. We discussed that the literal meaning of “to forgive” in Greek means to send something away; it means giving up and giving over. So when we forgive we are giving up and giving over our hurts, anger, desires for justice, and all that happened to God. We are literally sending to him everything and trusting that he can hold onto our hurts and deal with them. That’s what forgiveness is.

Forgiveness frees us from holding onto the burden of hurt. Forgiveness frees us from replaying that event or conversation over and over again in our minds. Forgiveness frees not only the other person but also ourselves because we no longer are holding onto the hurt – God is.

Forgiveness is not simply forgetting. It’s not saying “no big deal” when what happened was a big deal. It’s not pretending that a wrong didn’t happen. Forgiveness is sending away the wrong to God, so that you can be made whole. That’s what forgiveness is all about. And we can make a choice to forgive.

We ended with inviting people to make that choice. And yes forgiving is a hard choice. But it is the only choice that leads to healing, because forgiving leads to God.

So to make that choice we invited people to write down their hurts, betrayals, and unforgiveness and to “send it to God”. To do this we invited people to symbolically burn the paper, shred it, or toss it out. The point was to do something physical and tangible that would be a reminder that we have forgiven that person, and “sent it” to God. The point was to do something physical that echoed what we were doing emotionally and spiritually. We were sending away our hurts; we were forgiving others.

So that’s what we touched on yesterday. After church I watched a video sent to me by a member from the church. It’s on forgiveness and I think it illustrates well what we’re talking about. The last line of the video is a great reminder for us today, “If God doesn’t come in forgiveness cannot come”. So why not watch it and today seek to practice forgiveness and sent to God anything that you’re holding onto…

by Andrew Mills

Learning to Forgive

Forgiveness is really hard to do. I mean true forgiveness is extremely difficult to give and to do.

Forgiveness is easy:

  • When the person realizes the hurt they caused
  • When they feel regret, and a sense of responsibility over the hurt
  • When they ask for it and truly mean it
  • When they learn from the mistake and don’t repeat it.

When all of those things happen forgiveness seems almost natural and it is almost easy.

But what about when those things don’t happen? How do you forgive when someone doesn’t want it? How do you forgive when someone doesn’t even think what they did was wrong? How do you forgive when someone intentionally hurts you and is happy about it?

It is in those instances that forgiveness is truly tough. We know holding onto hurt for years just causes bitterness and isn’t healthy. But the other option of just forgetting about it and letting it go doesn’t seem to do justice to the depth of hurt we feel. So we end up with two options that aren’t helpful or healthy. We can either hold onto it, or forget about it when really what we want is to deal with it. But how do you deal with it when the other person or party doesn’t care and doesn’t want to?

This is the complexity of forgiveness. This is the importance of the topic and on Sunday we’re taking a look at how to practice forgiveness in the truly tough situations. But before we get there have you ever had to forgive in a difficult situation? How did you do it? What helped and how did God work in you to heal?

And for all we still hold onto, on Sunday we’re going to explore how to give it to God…

by Andrew Mills

Saying “All Done”

I blog a lot about my little boy Hudson. This is because he is a huge part of my life. The other reason is because I learn so much from him. Jesus says that little children can teach us about his Kingdom. And Hudson did that today.

I think we all struggle between often not doing really bad things, but just doing okay things. We often choose to do things that are urgent, but maybe not important. You might not make the terrible choice, but instead settle for a rhythm of regular or okay choices. Hudson taught me this today.

I was trying to send off some emails before work, and to get a jump on the day. And Hudson was running around. All of a sudden he runs up to me, shuts the laptop, hands me a book, and says “all done”. He then grins, snuggles up to me, and says “sit” and “again” which means to read his book again. So that’s what we did.

What a good reminder though. That sometimes we need to say “all done” to the stresses of life, to emails, to outside pressures, so we don’t miss what’s important right in front of us. For me that was a little boy running around in his diaper wanting to be read stories. But for you maybe it’s spending time with your spouse. Maybe it’s connecting with a friend. Maybe it’s getting some alone time for yourself reading, walking, or a good cup of coffee.

But my challenge to you today is to say “all done” to something good, and spend that time on someone great.

by Andrew Mills

Don’t Pick Up the Jawbone

On Sunday we talked a bit about forgiveness. You can download it here. We looked at Samson and saw how violence, anger, and hurt can just escalate and grow if we don’t deal with it. That, unless we actually learn to deal with our hurt, it can end up driving us, depressing us, and distancing us from our loved ones. We looked at Judges 15 and how when you pursue revenge you never get even, you simply get worse. The story begins with a man, a goat, and a troubled marriage and it ends with hundreds dead, an economy wrecked, and a man hated by both his people and his enemies.

We ended our time thinking about the last scene with Samson where he picks up a jawbone to go another round with the Philistines. This can happen so easily in any relationship where we get hurt and so we want to hurt back. We take a swing with a “jawbone” through words, actions, and thoughts. We lash out saying “they made us do this” (Judges 15:3), trying to get even (15:7), and paying them back for what they did to us (15:11).

The problem is that’s not how Jesus acts or treats us. Jesus gives us a different example where we don’t respond to hate with hate, or hurt with hurt. Jesus shows us a different path where forgivness leads to life. Jesus reminds us that avoiding forgiving simply leads to prolonged hurt. C.S. Lewis’ says “Every one says forgiveness is a lovely idea, until they have something to forgive.” I agree forgiveness isn’t easy, but it is right…

So we ended with this challenge for this week: don’t pick up the jawbone. This week when you are tempted to lash out, to say something snarky, or to get even, break the cycle of hurt by stepping up and forgiving. And next Sunday we’ll be looking at how to practically forgive…

Questions for Discussion

  • Adult Discussion Questions
  • How have you seen violence or hate “cycle” in your life?
  • Why is so hard to break the cycle of revenge, hate, or violence?
  • Is there any cycles in your own life that you need break? To take the first step and “drop the jawbone”?
  • Questions for Young Families
  • Ask your kids what they want to do when soemoen hurts them. Get them to share about the feelings. Ask them what the right thing is to do when someone hurts them. Share with them how if we try to “get even” it always “get’s worse”.
  • Weekly Challenge: Don’t pick up the jawbone – practice forgiveness
by Andrew Mills

You are Known: My Personal Idiosyncrasies and Oddities

Isn’t it a great feeling to be known?

My office knows me pretty well already. They already talk about my funny idiosyncrasies. Apparently I use the phrase “let’s create a space” about 10 times a day. They know I love coffee. They know that I’m introverted and awkward at times. They also know that at any given point if there is music in the background I might sing a line along with the music, for their musical enjoyment (whether they enjoy my singing has yet to be proven). And that if they mention anything close to the Bible they are in store for a 5-minute Andrew teaching on any given subject.

But why does this all matter?

because I think deep down we all want to be known. We want to be noticed, recognized, and valued. Deep down don’t you want someone to truly know who you are? And not just know some things about you but pick up on parts of about you that you never really realized? I never realized how often I use the word “space” until I started working here. But my friends here picked up on it and made me feel known.

And isn’t this what Jesus is really getting at when he says the Father even knows all the hairs on your head (Luke 12:7)? He’s not talking about the Father’s great counting skills. What he is getting at is that you are known. You are seen, noticed, and he takes a deep interest in you. The Father picks up on your traits, and quirks and actually appreciates them. He knows how you love coffee, bad day-time drama, smooth or chunky peanut butter, or any other quirk ~ because he knows you.

So you have a God who knows you. Not an impersonal someone up in the clouds, but a deeply invested and interested God truly sees the real you. And isn’t that a beautiful thing? To know that you known, cared for, and noticed.

So today as you go about your day, doing things in a way that’s all your own. Know that you’re not alone. But have a God who sees you, smiles, and says you know what I love about…its this ________….

by Andrew Mills

Getting through the Tough Stuff

This Sunday I preached on why bad things happen but most of all how to get through them. You can download the sermon here.

The main point I focused on though, was that bad things happen because we live in a broken world. The world and our lives aren’t yet what they were meant to be. We struggle with sin, broken relationships, death, decay, and difficulty. This is not the world God desired. But the promise of God is that a new world is coming; that he will transform this world into all that it was meant to be.

But in the meantime how do we get through the difficult stuff that happens until God’s future reaches us?

Well we discovered through Romans 8 three promises God gives us to make it through a tough day, week, or even years. The three promises are as follows:

  • That the Spirit Prays for Us
  • That the Father work everything out
  • That the Son is always with us

These three promises for me are really moving. The fact that when we are down and out, in distress, and weakness God prays for us is astounding. The Holy Spirit is praying for you and all that is before you – praying what you need but don’t have the words for. This is beautiful.

The Father also promises to work everything to good. That doesn’t mean that everything is good, but that out of anything God can create good. That nothing you are currently going through can stop God’s goodness from coming to pass.

And lastly that the Son is always with us and that nothing can separate us from his love. What is in the forefront of your mind and is currently taking up thought space? God’s promise to you is that – that thing – won’t separate you from Jesus. That too is beautiful. These are the promises of God to you.

Which one matters most of you? What other promises from Scripture have helped you get through some rough stuff?

by Andrew Mills