How to Kill Your Relationshiop

There are five ways to kill your relationship with Jesus, and they’re really simple…

1.     Comparison
2.     Comparison
3.     Comparison
4.     Comparison
5.     Comparison

I mean, I’m sure that there are other ways, but this seems to be one of the fastest ways that you can harm and damage your relationship with Jesus. We so often and so easily take our eyes off Jesus and who He is calling us to be and look around at what other people are becoming and try to do that.

And, this is one of the surest ways to kill, not only your spiritual growth, but also your relationship with Jesus. Your relationship is hampered, harmed and can even be cut off when you seek to become someone other than the person Jesus is shaping you into. The really dangerous part of this is that you can feel full of guilt and shame for not being someone else, when you were never designed to be someone else – God designed you to be you. And, here is a true, but radical thought – God actually likes you and the person He is shaping you into becoming. You don’t need to be someone else, but to embrace the person and the callings that God has for you.

But, we struggle with accepting who we are. And, while so many of us “know” this, it is truly hard to live this. We see other people’s giftings, inclinations or passions and wish we could be like them. I’ve seen this all over the church, and even in pastors; pastors who wish that they could speak like “so and so” or lead like “so and so” or pray like “so and so.” But, you aren’t called to be anyone else; you are called to be you.

And this applies to not only pastors, but also apostles too.

In the book of John, Peter is having a last conversation with Jesus, and what we find Him doing right as Jesus is directing him is this – comparing. He sees the beloved disciple following and says this, “What about him, Lord?”

Jesus response, I think, is needed for all of us. He says this essentially, “What does it matter the future I have for him? What is that to you? You, follow me.”

And, I think that’s good advice for all of us. What does it matter what someone else’s gifting or calling is. You be you and follow Jesus. Because the truth is, the world needs all of us – each unique, each simply focusing on following Jesus and not focusing on anyone else.

One thought on “How to Kill Your Relationshiop

  1. Well said! The other way comparison kills is through pride – look how much better I am than those other people. These two impacts – despair and pride – are why comparison is so spiritually deadly.


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